So this was what I did instead.
So who's been reading their story books? What classic scene have 7JNL represented here?
I think this one is something to do with palm sunday...
This is God (that's the wizardy looking chap) telling Noah (who luckily already worked in a boatyard) to build an ark.
Miss (after 30 minutes): "is it really necessary to have reins?"
Millie: "Miss, don't be silly, you can't just jump on a horse and hope he knows where you're going!"
This is Lord Vishnu, sitting on the cobra that floated on the waters that washed upon the shores of nothingness (or alternatively, that washed upon the shores of a yellow piece of sugar paper).
I have genuinely no idea what this is supposed to be. In what religious story do two men on horseback drown the villagers? Answers on a postcard.
I think this might be my favourite. This is Adam and Eve (of course!) after Eve ate the apple (foolish woman). That thing in the background, that looks like a used condom? That's the snake, you filthy minded individual. Who taught you RE?
George, who made the scene above, came up a bit sheepishly towards the end of the lesson.
"Miss, can I ask you something without you getting cross?"
George is one of my favourite children. One of my summer term projects is to work out just what it is about him that I like so much. I'm not certain, but something tells me it's a little strange to be quite so fond of a ginger eleven year old.
"Miss, do you think this is appropriate? It's of when they mated. We done it behind a bush, to be proper like"
"I love it, George, Awesome. What do you think the headteacher would say? Maybe this one is just for us, not for the corridor display?"